


you can call me "babe" for the weekend

by icarusfallen



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Hurt No Comfort, Idol Hwang Hyunjin, M/M, Not an Idol Han Jisung, Post-Break Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:15:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28040721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icarusfallen/pseuds/icarusfallen
Summary: They hadn't seen each other in a year, but if one weekend with Hyunjin is all Jisung gets, then it has to be enough.
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Hwang Hyunjin
Comments: 4
Kudos: 51





	you can call me "babe" for the weekend

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this in half an hour listening to taylor swift's 'tis the damn season lol this is all, really.

Jisung traces the tips of his fingers down Hyunjin’s naked spine. 

The blonde haired man is asleep – or Jisung chooses to believe he is. His own eyelids are drooping, the exhaustion of the holidays catching up with him. He had spent the past couple of days at his grandparents’ house, his mother’s food still sitting comfortably in his stomach. They had driven back home earlier this morning, as his brother has an early flight the next day and Jisung’s mother had wanted him to relax properly before flying.

Seollal is always fun, Jisung reckons. His grandparents still insist on giving him hefty sums of money, never mind the fact that he makes enough of it to be living just fine in Seoul, and his mom has never lost her touch when it comes to food. It’s also the perfect opportunity for him and his brother to sit together and share a bottle of makgeolli while reminiscing on their mistakes of the past year. He always goes to bed satisfied and wakes up with enough of an alcohol headache to attack whatever is left of the food in the fridge. 

But this year is different. 

This year, Jisung got a text from Hyunjin minutes after waking up. 

_ i’m in seoul and free for the weekend, want to meet? _

He hadn’t spoken to Hyunjin in a year or so. 

Or rather, he hadn’t seen Hyunjin in person in a year or so. They speak just fine, sending each other texts every now and then. Happy birthday wishes, asking after family, Jisung congratulating Hyunjin on whatever news about his career had come out. Hyunjin is just too busy being rich and famous, living off of making music and performing it to crowds of overeager fans. He’s too busy living the life him and Jisung had daydreamed of for so long, so he’s not available for more than the occasional kkt message. 

It’s almost like they hadn’t… They weren’t… They didn’t… Not like it matters anymore. 

But Hyunjin sends the text and Jisung is weak,  _ so _ weak. He’s fated to always ache for Hyunjin. So he replies, and they agree to meet at Jisung’s place since Hyunjin is at risk of being recognized too often to just casually stroll the streets of Seoul, even during Seollal weekend. 

If the intention behind Hyunjin sending the text was just for them to meet up and hang out for a couple of hours, it fails as soon as he crosses the threshold of Jisung’s apartment, a few minutes after midday. 

Jisung hadn’t even been home for that long, only a couple of hours. Just enough time to put away the stuff he had packed, take a shower and change into more comfortable clothes. 

Hyunjin’s arms wrap around his waist the moment the taller man kicks his shoes off. Jisung goes willingly, even more so when lips press against his, when he’s pushed against the living room wall. His apartment is small, enough so that it’s barely a few steps before they reach his bedroom door, but it’s too far a distance for them at that moment. Instead, they fuck for the first time in years right in the middle of the living room, Hyunjin on his knees in front of Jisung. Hyunjin takes him into his mouth with a practiced ease, of someone who had done this several times in the past.

Jisung refuses to think about the them that they used to be, refuses to think about the number of times they had done this in the apartment they used to share with other trainees. He just. Refuses to acknowledge anything other than Hyunjin being right here, right now.

Eventually they do make it to his bed. Eventually, Hyunjin laughs at him and calls him overeager when he sees the amount of lube Jisung keeps in his bedside table. He sobers up eventually, almost as if his brain has caught up that the quantity can only mean one thing. Jisung shushes him with a kiss pressed to the inside of Hyunjin’s thigh, long legs spread as far as they would go. 

Sex with Hyunjin is  _ easy _ , as it’s always been, and they manage round three, round  _ four _ , by the time they deem themselves sated. At least for the moment. 

The light that sneaks through the curtains of his bedroom window comes from the moon. It’s high in the sky by now, and it’s not strong enough to properly illuminate Hyunjin, the way Jisung wishes it would. He’s too lazy and comfortable to move, doesn’t want to miss a single second he’s given to look at Hyunjin’s face. 

“Still staring at me while I sleep?” Jisung’s touch on Hyunjin’s back pauses for a moment and he’s surprised to note Hyunjin’s awake, his eyes staring right into Jisung’s. “You’ve always had the habit.”

“You know you’re gorgeous,” Jisung hesitates but ultimately decides to keep touching. Hyunjin doesn’t mind, he never did. “Let this mere mortal appreciate your godly looks.” 

Hyunjin snorts and Jisung knows if he was more awake, he’d be rolling his eyes at Jisung right now and shoving him away. It seems he’s sleepy enough that he chooses not to move, blinking slowly while keeping his gaze on Jisung’s face. 

“You’re gorgeous too, you know I always thought that.”

Jisung’s breath hitches. He’s not going to- he  _ can’t _ entertain this. The sex is painful enough as it is. He can’t have Hyunjin talking all serious about things they would share confidently in the past. There’s an abysm between the two of them by now, worlds of difference that comes from an opportunity that was given to one but no the other. Jisung’s made his peace with it but he can’t have Hyunjin disturbing said peace with his nostalgia. 

“I thought you were on tour,” he offers instead, fingertips brushing against the back of Hyunjin’s neck. “In the United States, wasn’t it?” 

The other man hums a confirmation. 

“We always get a break for Seollal, but this year my parents were too busy to take more than Thursday through Saturday off, so,” a small shrug. “Wanted to see you.”

The last words are whispered more than said and Jisung lets out a sigh. So much for not wanting to touch on the serious subjects. He should’ve known Hyunjin would be the one to go there – it’s always Hyunjin who goes there. 

“You’re seeing me,” he tries to keep it light, he does. But. “Could see me more if you tried.”

“Jisung.”

“Hyunjin.”

“You know I can’t, I-,”

“You’re an idol, you can’t risk your career because of a guy you were in a committed relationship with for three years over half a decade ago, I know,” there’s less bitterness in his words than Jisung expected there to be, but his touch falls from Hyunjin’s back and he feels more awake than he’s felt in so long. “You can fuck him for a weekend after a year without seeing each other, though.”

“Yeah, yeah, I can.”

The honesty is harsh but welcome. It’s a bucket of freezing water, a cold reminder of the reality they are living in. This is how things have to be between the two of them, how they are going to be between them for the rest of their lives, most likely. Or rather, until Hyunjin meets a nice and proper girl, an idol just like him, who he can be seen with, who he can date. Sure, there will be repercussions when people find out he’s in a relationship, but ultimately it’s nothing compared to what would’ve happened if him and Jisung hadn’t broken up, if they had chosen to stay together. 

Jisung knows but it still hurts.

It makes him think of Chan and how often he’ll go on a tangent about the existence of multiple universes. How in one of them they actually did manage to debut under JYP, one in which he wasn’t relegated to the position of producer – one Chan will insist he adores, but Jisung knows him and knows how much he misses performing – and they are in a group, all together. 

He won’t admit how often he ponders about the possibility of there being a universe in which Hyunjin and Jisung never had to break up. They dated for three years only, which is half of the time Hyunjin’s been an idol, and they were so  _ young _ when they started, but Jisung had always been so sure of Hyunjin. They had been so sure of each other. 

(He has to believe that Hyunjin’s loved him as much as Jisung loved-  _ loves him _ , otherwise he might lose his mind.)

“It’s all I can give you, Jisung, you know I’m sor-,”

“Don’t be sorry,” his eyes fall shut, screwed tight. “Don’t be sorry that you got to do what I wanted and couldn’t. Please. I know you’re not sorry you have this life, I know you love doing what you do, and I’m truly,  _ genuinely _ happy for you. So, don’t be sorry.” 

Silence falls between the two of them, just the sound of their breathing breaking it. Jisung feels like crying. He avoids thinking about this, about them because he always ends up feeling like crying, and it’s Hyunjin who always did the crying, not him. 

“Okay.” 

He blinks his eyes open at the touch of a hand to his face. Hyunjin caresses his cheek like Jisung is something precious, like Jisung is still the owner of his heart, and it’s enough to make Jisung believe. 

“Okay.”

“You have me for the weekend.”

“Okay.” 

It has to be enough. 

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you enjoyed! or that it made you sad like it made me!
> 
> kudos and comments are welcome, hmu on twitter @ jisunings


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